Like clockwork, the sign for the Canadian town of Dildo has gone viral again.


And every time that happens, internet aficionados are quickly reminded that, despite being deeply rooted in Newfoundland, the very American Jimmy Kimmel has been the town’s honorary mayor since 2019. 



“A guy named Todd” once staged an unsuccessful coup, but now it’s practically an army of Dildoians who want to get rid of Kimmel, not just Todd. Kimmel has, reportedly, “ghosted [them] harder than an American ignoring the metric system.” It’s an act of patriotism, so much so that the slogan of the campaign, which comes equipped with a proper Change.org petition, is “Let’s Keep Dildo Canadian, eh?”


Quietly launched five months ago by a Change.org user who goes by the name of “French Family,” the petition only recently started heating up, reaching 1,000 signatures a week ago. (The current count is a little more than 1,400 verified signatures.) “I live in the USA now, but it’s important to our earth. So I signed this petition,” reads the only supporter comment, dated last week.



Kimmel’s proposed replacement is Gerry Dee, who, like Kimmel, is also a comedian, actor and TV host, though a much more Canadian one as he hails from Toronto. He’s certainly more than ready for the job. In fact, on a recent episode of Family Feud Canada, a show that Dee hosts, the alleged petition organizers appeared as contestants, and briefed Dee on their goal of “making Dildo Canadian again.” 



“I just want to be called Mayor Gerry,” explained Dee, visibly flattered.


He then took a brief pause before looking straight into the camera. “[To] the Mayor of Dildo, Jimmy Kimmel,” he vowed. “Coming after ya.”