19 Times People Exacted Gloriously Petty Revenge
Nathan Johnson
Published
09/06/2021
in
Funny
Revenge is a dish best served petty, is it not? While we all love an epic revenge story -- The Punisher, The Revenant, Kill Bill -- there's a lot to be said about the small-time vengeance-enthusiasts.
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1.
My mum and her friend had a massive fight, and my mum's friend sent a letter to my mum scolding her and pretty much saying "We're no longer friends" and my mum, as an Ex-Teacher, took out a red pen, corrected all the spelling mistakes and grammatical mistakes, and mailed it right back to her -
2.
I’ve told this one before, but it makes me happy to retell it. I had a boss 7-8 years ago whom I hated. She was the fakest and most entitled person I had ever met. One day, she decided that she didn’t like the smell of microwave popcorn... So she waved her magic office wand and had it banned. Fast forward a month or so. I was browsing Amazon and found one of those USB sticks that emits a smell when plugged in...the smell of buttered popcorn. I bought it, plugged it into the back of her computer, and she had the sweet smell of PopSecret in her office for six f**king months. She complained almost every day. It’s the sweetest revenge I’ve ever tasted. -
3.
I have a friend whose pumpkinfall display at the end of his driveway would be run over by the neighborhood jerk. happened every year. my friend decided to put a stop to it. he withdrew money from his savings account so he would have enough to buy the largest punkin he could find, along with several large bags of Quikcrete. filled that puppy up and made a real pretty display. The jacka*s broke the axle of his shotty car when he hit that pumpkin. could not drive away. my friend had his car towed away, too. -
4.
I moved to America to be with this guy (let's call him Richard). Richard happened to work at the same big box store as my friend J, and one day when I came to meet J from work, a coworker innocently said "Are you looking for Richard? He's staying with his girlfriend." Me: "I'M HIS GIRLFRIEND." Now another thing you should know about Richard is he bought his toothbrushes wholesale and lived in the grungiest apartment ever. I cleaned every inch of that bathroom, toilet included, with each and every one of those remaining toothbrushes, documenting every step with photographs. Then I rinsed them in the toilet, and put them back in the box. And I packed my s**t and left. Ten years later, when I'd calculated he was on the last brush, I sent him the pictures. -
5.
Not me, but for my wife. When we were younger and kind of on hard times,she took a pretty shady job at a local factory. The first two weeks she was there, she had her lunch stolen at least 5 or 6 times. Even open drinks. I was pretty pissed, a lot of times I would grill for her or make her lunch, and she was going hungry. One night I bought a big a*s Gatorade and a box of those women's laxitives, both red in color. Couldn't tell the two were mixed, but we found out who the thief was. -
6.
I wear hearing aids, and a girl in my high school math class used to make fun of me. I had not said two words to her and gave her no reason to do it, she was just being evil. I recording her mocking my hearing loss on my phone and played it for her parents. They took the new car they just bought her back to the dealership. -
7.
My dad had an old truck parked on the back of our property that some kept stealing small parts from (cap, rotor, points, etc). We wired it to an electric fence power supply. One evening we heard a bunch of yelling and swearing and went back there and the guy left us some free tools. -
8.
My friend’s Sprite kept getting stolen even though she wrote her name all over the can. Finally after the fifth time, it happened she got a habanero, cut it open and rubbed it all over the top of the can and left it in the fridge. We found out who the thief was when that afternoon we hear the office drama queen shriek in her cubicle and run to the water cooler. She never stole anything again. -
9.
I used to manage a Starbucks when one of my baristas asked a guy his name and he just flipped the f**k out belittling her, called her stupid etc and didn’t give a name. Anyway I take over the hand off drinks and place his drink just on the hand off with no words. (I’ll add it was a busy store with a lot of people waiting. I just keep putting drinks out for about 10/15 minutes and douchebag walks up and picks up his drink that’s now lukewarm and goes “is this mine?” I just respond with “I don’t know it doesn’t have a name on it”. -
10.
My coworker sometimes throws out her lunch in the garbage can at my desk instead of her own, because she claims she can't stand the smell of old ketchup that's been sitting out for a couple hours. I've asked her several times to stop, but she will then just wait until I get up to go to the bathroom and do it, and hide my garbage can under my desk so she thinks I won't see it. Every time she does it, I wait until she goes to the bathroom, take out the little plastic container that she had ketchup in, and put it way in the back of her bottom desk drawer. There's 6 in there now, the oldest is over a month old. So far, she hasn't noticed the smell. Gonna keep doing it and see how long it takes her to notice. -
11.
We were kids staying at the seaside on holiday with our family. My little sister would always make a pretty sandcastle, and the next day it would have been kicked down and she'd cry. We wanted to find out who was doing it, so one day we stayed behind to spy. We watched as a bunch of jerk older boys came by and kicked her castle down, laughing smugly. So the next night, we covered a big beach rock in sand and decorated it. Like clockwork, the jerk kids came with their smug faces and this time kicked a solid rock with all of their might. The yowl and the look on their faces was the best revenge ever. -
12.
Went to a restaurant for lunch during a work shift. Out of three parking spots somebody decided to park across every single one. There were no other parking spots at the time. So i decided to park within half a foot from my passenger side to his driver door. Ordered and got my food, and noticed an older (60+) man leave and walk in the direction of our parked cars. When I left and walked towards my car, sure enough he was there, tray of drinks in one hands and a bag of food in the other, just absolutely struggling to get into his vehicle. He called out about why I parked like this and my only reply was “why did you park across 3 spots, park like and a*s you better expect to be treated like one” -
13.
I was dating this girl and thought she was the one, so I gave her the keys to my apartment. I worked late for my job, so I was just happy there was someone in my bed. I came home one night and she was awake. She confessed to using my apartment to cheat on me with seven different people, so I packed her stuff up. I then lied to her and said I moved to Seattle, but moved to Hawaii instead. Three month's after being in Hawaii, I get a phone call from her. To my surprise she's called me from the Seattle airport. She flew out there to try and fix things between us. Me: So you're in Seattle? Her: Yeah! Weren't you listening? I came here to fix us. Me: Oh...well, that's too bad. Her: What's bad? Me: I'm in Hawaii. (Hung up the phone.) (Phone rings again.) Her: YOU LIED TO ME! Me: How does it feel? -
14.
I had a roommate who used a lot of spoons (he ate a lot of pudding, soup, ice cream, yogurt, etc) and would never wash his dishes. I was tired of washing his dishes so I let them pile up in the sink until we got to the last spoon. This one I washed and hid in my room each time I used it. -
15.
When I worked at Starbucks we had one racist and sexist costumer who always disturbed our work. He only wanted the men to make his drinks and he literally ignored the women (or said something creepy) and he didn’t want our one black guy to make his drink either. We always gave him decaffeinated even though he asked for caffeinated. Pretty petty and childish but it helped a little bit. -
16.
So I’m at Costco, in need of dog food, and it’s ridiculously busy for a Monday. Barely any parking spots until I spot one at the end of the lot. I make my way down the aisle, and am about to turn into the parking spot when a lady RUNS OVER THE CURB and almost hits me to take the spot. Thankfully I tapped my brakes in time or she would have taken off my bumper. I look up and she is shaking her head and wagging her finger in a “no” motion at me. WTF? I was like okay I’ll just wait for her to back up since I’m obviously turning into the spot. She doesn’t. My girlfriend is with me and was pissed that the lady wasn’t budging. I gave her my Costco card and just sat in the aisle in a face off with this lady. She goes inside, gets the dog food, comes back out, and loads up the car. She then pushes the cart into the spot we were waiting for and hops in the car. The look on the woman’s face was enough to give me satisfaction for a week. She had to get out and move the cart so she could park once I reversed through the entire aisle. Worth it. -
17.
I caught my flatmate telling lies about me to some mutual friends. I made plans to move out the next month. In the meantime, she went out of town for a week, and left her car parked in its usual spot in the parking lot. I threw birdseed on it every morning and evening, so when she came home, the birds wouldn't leave her car alone. -
18.
This guy insulted me so I found a notebook he left in class, and left it in the bookshelves and covered it with books so he could never find it. -
19.
I heard of this guy who found out his girlfriend cheated on him, so he out mass gainer powder in her smoothies for a month and she gained like 15 pounds.
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