16 People Reveal The Best Way They Ever Quit A Job
Nathan Johnson
Published
09/23/2023
in
Funny
Not every job is going to be the place you spend the rest of your career. Sometimes you just need to get out of a bad place as soon as possible, and run for the woodwork. That's what these people decided to do, and in some creative ways.
If you're working at some place that stinks, you might not want to quit in a normal way. Why give your awful boss the convenience of an easy exit? No, screw those jerks!
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1.
My boss told me that we were going to spend our breaks doing mandatory Zumba, and I told her I was going home. -
2.
Was at a job for 3 years, consistently in the top 3 of my department in terms of performance. Asked my supervisor repeatedly if I could be recommended for advancement/promotion and he always told me he was trying his best to get me new opportunities. Found out from a friend in a different department that I'd been considered a top candidate for 4 different promotions and each time my supervisor had blocked it. When I confronted him with this information he told me it was true and he did it because "I could never find someone who does what you do without paying them a lot more". Internally said f**k this, I quit and found a new job within 3 months. Took all my PTO and on the day I came back I quit 2 hours into the day leaving him high and dry at a peak time. F*** that dude. -
3.
Working at Walmart, after a couple years of being a mindless goon, I save up my 2 week vacation and put in for it. Told them I was seeing family. The last day of work before my 2 week vacation, I put in my 2 week notice. Took the manager a min to do the math. “So... you’re not coming back?” “No. No I’m not. Take care.” -
4.
Didn't happen to me but I got to watch this happen. I went into a Taco John's and ordered a super burrito with no tomatoes or black olives, to go. They weren't super busy but there were a couple of orders ahead of mine. So I'm standing near the counter watching them put items together and I see that they have started on my burrito. The cook loads it up with everything and wraps it up. He has it in his right hand and reaches up with his left to clear out the order on the monitor. He stops for a moment when he realizes that he f****d up by putting everything on the burrito. He is facing me and he turns around and fires a 100 mph fast-ball burrito against the back wall. He walks into the back room, takes off his Taco Johns shirt, puts on a T-shirt, grabs his smokes and his drink and heads out the back door. 30 seconds later the girl running the drive-thru wants to know where Brian is. I pointed him out to her as by now he is walking across the parking lot toward downtown. I told her that I think Brian gave his notice. She says a few choice words and wants to know what I ordered. Way to give it the man, Brian! -
5.
I had to lay off my entire staff (and myself) with 8 hours notice. I was the contract project manager on a government project (office type work). At our periodic review on a Thursday, the government announced they would not be renewing our contract and our last day was Friday (the next day). I brought everyone into the conference room first thing the next day, let everyone know that we were all out of a job and that today was everyone's last day. I had everyone email me their resumes, and we went over everyone's on the conference room projector and updated them over the course of the day. I then printed out "reference" sheets for everyone, and we all spent the remainder of the day writing letters of recommendation for each other. I ordered everyone pizza, and bought everyone a round of drinks at the bar next door. Most folks had jobs by the end of the next week. -
6.
Was working at a restaurant in TN. Found a better job that actually gave me hours and went in to put my two week notice. I got a lecture about how I could never come back to the company since it wasn't a full two weeks. I then suggested politely that "that's great, let's say today is my last day then." Was such a relief. -
7.
My boss told me that we were going to spend our breaks doing mandatory Zumba, and I told her I was going home.Little back story - This was at a kids camp where I was a cook. Kids would come in on Sunday and leave on the Saturday, so I was there all week making 4 meals a day plus a mid-afternoon snack for 100+ people. The one break I got in the day was an hour sometime before lunch, but we were working from 7am - 11pm every single day(for $200 a week) -
8.
I was working as a field manager for a company that had a small team. They had recently hired 2 new guys who were fairly green to the industry but not totally brain-dead. One guy, let's call him Gary. He's kind of quiet, kept his head down. I had a distinct feeling that he didn't like me, because as his direct supervisor it was up to me to train him up. Granted, I wasn't the best teacher, as I was somewhat blunt and direct. But never insulting or demeaning. It's a slow week, and we're cleaning up our warehouse. The five of us are all knocking it out so we can get out early, but Gary is kind of slacking off. Since he's not really putting much effort in, I ask "Hey Gary, can you run the garbage out?" So he loads up the truck and heads out to the dumpsters behind the building (we had a lot of trash). But leaves behind the cardboard... So I think he's making two runs, to kind of stretch out the workload, right? He comes back, and proceeds to not also take the cardboard. "Yo Gary - can you also do the cardboard." He gets pissed, storms out to the office, and proceeds to scream about me being a d**k to him, to the bosses. Important note, I did not know this. I figured he was going to hit the bathroom? I walk into the office about 5 minutes later to hear him complaining about how I'm an a*****e. The people he's telling this to look at me over his shoulder, and I realize that he's talking mad s**t about me. He realizes it, turns around, and it's a classic "oh f**k." So my one boss, he tells Gary that I am his supervisor and while he may not like me, he has to at least do as I ask, provided it's within reason. And taking garbage and cardboard out is part of our regular duties, and we all take care of it. Gary gets insanely pissed, starts screaming about how we're all just buddy buddy, and quits. He removes his keys from his belt (we have truck keys) and literally THROWS THEM at my boss, and storms out cursing. We're all in shock and I'm feeling kinda bashful. Gary comes back in 5 minutes later and asks for the keys... because his own car and house keys were still attached. Once he gets them, he says "f**k you" to all of us, and storms back out. So epic. To this day, still my favorite of all time quitting stories. -
9.
Cafe manager hired a shift leader from outside the company, which was full of young people like me who needed more hours and pay. The new shift leader needed to be full trained likely lied on her job application but was still accepted. She was fired 2nd week after 3 no call no shows , and when I asked my manager why he would hire someone with no experience over me or my coworkers, he said he would have to see me work in my current position for another year . This is a job where they cap you under 28 hours. I told him I didnt know what to say and that he can expect my two week notice... I just heard from my friend that the manager is quitting and they have Hiring ads posted legit everywhere at the moment. -
10.
Worked at a job for over eight years. Was promised a promotion if I stayed when I was about ready to look for something else. Was called into the office down the road a bit to be informed they were bringing in an ex employee who had quit a year or two before for the job I was promised. I had heard a rumor of this and had already made my decision. The boss looked shocked when I said I quit. I punched out and left. Simple but sweet. -
11.
I worked for Best Buy back in the early 2000s, before Geek Squad, as one of their computer techs while in college. The job itself wasn't horrible, but it was boring as hell because anything past a simple upgrade was sent out to some depot, so I wasn't very invested in the job. On top of that, they never got around to ordering my work shirts, so I just walked around in a black polo I already owned instead of a black Best Buy polo. You'd think that was a hint that they didn't give a s**t about their employees, but then came all the issues with scheduling. I had a very rigid and predictable school schedule: 8AM to 330PM every day. I told my boss when he hired me about it, and he said it wasn't an issue. However, they kept scheduling me for Noon to 8PM or some weird s**t that conflicted with my schedule at college. After the first few times of "Where the hell have you been!" it kinda became a running joke...and I realized maybe a better job was a good idea. Cue the biggest shopping day of the year: Black Friday. Store was set to open at some ungodly early hour like 3AM, so they wanted everyone at the store at 2AM to get ready. I drag my a*s in, and an hour later all hell breaks loose. Customers being a******s, coworkers being grumpy, and the store manager being a d**k to everyone. It sucked, I was tired, and we quickly figured out that there was no intent on giving any breaks even though we were scheduled enough hours to legally require one. About 5AM roles around and coworkers are getting pissed at management for no breaks and started treating customers like c**p. Manager comes over and starts yelling, so I take off my name tag, throw it on the counter and tell him I quit, right in front of the computer dept staff and customers and grab my coat and start walking out. He yells after me "YOU HAVE TO TURN IN YOUR SHIRT RIGHT NOW!" to which I turn around and yell back "I'VE BEEN HERE THREE MONTHS AND YOU NEVER GOT ME A SHIRT!" Petty, but damn that felt good. -
12.
I was a janitor at an elementary school. I worked there for several years and was popular with that k-1st grade teachers. I had to move to a different shift so I could work another job. So I swapped with another janitor that the 2nd grade hallway teachers liked. It made them mad I suppose and they would file complaints on my work and I often got called into the office. I was doing my job, but they wanted their other guy back. They were even being rude to me to my face. After several months of this, I get called to the office. My supervisor says "one more incident and I'm going to write you up" I was calm and said, "that's ok, I'd like to put my 2 weeks in". He looked shocked and said "Uh, don't you need some time to think about this?" I said ""I have. Their opinion of me isn't going to change, and I rather save us some time " while not that epic. The look of "wth?" On his face was priceless. It was nice being able to quit like a calm reasonable person. In conclusion, I went back to school and got a much better job I enjoy. -
13.
My dad went into the boss' office during lunch and said "I have been contacted by the mothership. I have to return to my home planet. Thank you for the job." Shook the guy's hand, left the building, and never contacted them again. -
14.
Relayed to me by one of my buddies. Way back when we were still in HS my friend's coworker was getting fed up with the supermarket they worked in. It was a few towns over in a not so nice area and was right off the highway so that made it super busy and a lot of out of town commuters. He was going away to college and hated management. On his last day a woman walks up to his line and tries to brow beat him into taking a bunch of expired coupons. He tells her he needs to check with his supervisor and slowly pulls out a Jack in the Box from under his till and methodically places it on the scanner and just starts cranking the thing. When it finally pops he looks her in the eye and just says "Yeah, he said no". She flipped out and screamed for a manager while he just cracks up, takes off his smock and walks out. Edit: Sent a link to my buddy who wanted to correct a few points. Apparently we were older than I remember (Freshmen in college). The guy who quit was a HS senior. Also, he said it wasn't as smooth as I made it seem. The person who quit had already told his friend/coworker (same HS I assume?) about his plan and they were both barely keeping it together. -
15.
My cousin got bored and frustrated with his job, decided to leave. Searched and interviewed for a while. Landed a new gig. Friday morning he was going to put in his two weeks notice with his boss. That same Friday she told him, tears in her eyes, that his entire team was being laid off and it was their last day. He got three months' severance pay. -
16.
I once put in notice for my summer fast food job because it was interfering too much with my classwork once fall came around. The manager then stops everything and makes a huge production of announcing to everyone on shift that I was "leaving to go back to school." I was in 10th grade... he made it sound like I was about to get my PhD in curing cancer. -
17.
A co-worker of mine at Subway when I was working during college. It's the lunch shift of one of the busiest shops in the area. Guy gets halfway through making a sandwich, looks at the customer and then our manager and says, "Til next time bro," and just walks out. Never came back, not even to pick up his final paycheck. When I left to go back to school, I left 100 sticky notes in random places throughout the store that said, "Til Next Time." -
18.
My job told me since they fired the other supervisor I was just going to have to do his job from now on. My original job was insane now they expected me to double that with no compensation. Well it got old real fast and we had a seriously busy day and I decided I was done, I let $1,000,000+ of shipments sit in a trailer back in the corner and and told all my guys thanks for the hard work our day is done. I quit that day and the next day I got a call with them freaking out about all the money they lost, I just hung up on the boss and never looked back. -
19.
Have a colleague who many years ago quit at another company starting his letter with, "It is with mixed feelings I leave you, feelings of joy and contentment." He had to go back a year later, went fine though. -
20.
I stopped calling in for hours, they stopped calling me to ask if I was calling for hours. -
21.
I put in my two weeks at a call center and my supervisor (who was great the whole time I was there) said, "Yeah, I'm just gonna give you two weeks paid vacation. I know how done you are with this place - with your notice in, I give it an hour before you would call the first insulting customer you got a c********r. Have a nice life man, it's been good working with you." He was totally right. -
22.
I really like my supervisor but hated my job. He was a real cut up so that made it livable. I got a new job and handed him my written two weeks notice. Just my luck it was April 1st, he didn’t believe me. Every day I’d remind him how many days left. He started getting testy, he’d played a long game himself but this was too much. Apparently he was quite surprised when I stopped showing up! -
23.
Last job I quit, I put in my two weeks notice and then I came in every day and stayed a few hours late to help with the transition. On my last day I shook some hands, told everyone it was great working with them, handed in my kit and left. -
24.
I was just out of college and had got a "real" job, so when I had to quit the job I had been at for like a month, I wrote them an email and told them I was leaving to join Scientology in LA and to send my check to my mom at her address. I knew I would never go back there or use them as a reference so I told them some off the wall story. It was stupid but I still laugh about it. -
25.
Put in a request for a 2 week vacation, dropped by the store on day one of vacation and put in 2 my week's notice.
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