The Things You Do When You Live Alone
Mr_Incognito
Published
10/26/2014
in
Pop Culture
No roomate, no problems.
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1.
You rarely wear more than one layer below the waist. -
2.
Anywhere becomes a kitchen. -
3.
The location of your laundry varies depending on your mood. -
4.
You boogie down to all the "horrible" music on your playlist. -
5.
Artificially colored excuses for food are consumed in Costco-worthy quantities. -
6.
You spend more time watching movies alone than you do socializing. -
7.
You spend an irrational amount of time thinking how long it would take for someone to notice your absence if you were murdered or slipped in the shower. -
8.
Your dirty dish situation occasionally gets out of control. -
9.
Bodily functions are completed without reservations. -
10.
You do everything with the door wide open. -
11.
You don't even worry about staying silent late at night. -
12.
You watch your favorite "movies" with the volume turned on and then promptly realize why you never did before. -
13.
You lie to your friends about why you aren't going out tonight. -
14.
If you're single, you mingle without any fear of roommate judgment. -
15.
You watch all your favorite trashy TV shows without a single care as to how low your IQ is dropping. -
16.
You are frequently at war with yourself. -
17.
You strongly embrace the five-second rule. -
18.
You make up for the lack of company by having intense conversations with yourself. -
19.
You find creative ways to get rid of scary bugs -
20.
You bask in the glory of getting away with wearing the same outfit two days in a row. -
21.
Talking on the phone turns into an arduous trek around your living quarters. -
22.
Sometimes, your loneliness gets the better of you... -
23.
But ultimately, you know that there's no roommate worth giving up all this freedom for.
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